Day 12 - So what
So, it is officially “Easter Holidays”, school should have broken up yesterday and we should have been looking forward to two weeks of time off. Well, time off for Mia, with me trying to fit work in around childcare... But with no routine of getting up and out of the house for school, which I love. But that hasn’t happened for two weeks already so the new way of living now feels like the norm, and days and weeks blur in to each other and it’s difficult to differentiate between them. Has it only been two weeks...? As much as it’s hard when I work during school holidays, I have always loved them and made the most of them. As all working mums do. Thanks to help from my mum and play dates (can’t really call them that now Mia is 11 years old...) I have always managed to fit my usual amount of jobs in, over less but longer days, freeing up some of the holiday for days out and mini breaks. I am so lucky to be self employed and, as much as I can, I manage my own time. Obviously it’s totally different this year, as it is for everyone. It will be strange just being at home, and not seeing friends and family, especially over Easter. We had two mini breaks planned this holiday, firstly visiting the in laws in Spalding, then spending a few days with a bestie in The Lakes. These trips have not been cancelled, just put on hold until it’s possible to go.
My worry this holiday is “what will Mia do all day for two weeks?!” How can I try and implement school work when it is “holiday time”? But equally, I don’t want her on her phone all day every day. When lockdown first happened I was glad that Mia is the age she is. I thought if she was younger it would be more difficult to entertain her. Which of course it would be, but at least little ones can be entertained with more options, as they are happier (usually!) to play, do crafts, bake, walk, read together, without question.... An 11 year old teenager just wants to TikToc dance, FaceTime, WhatsApp and YouTube. I know parents of younger ones will probably disagree and think it far easier to have an older one during these times, but I think each age comes with pros and cons in this pandemic. I wish I could play schools with her again, and trains (which I used to hate). I wish we could get the house messy with crafts again, and snuggle up and read. I wish she would take a simple walk to see the ducks round the lake without question again. We did all these things when she was young, and I loved them, but now I have all this extra time I want to do them again! And now I miss them. Maybe if we could go back in time, after a day or two I would wish I had an 11 year old again.... Or maybe not.... But I am determined we will do crafts together. We will play board games. We will walk. We will have family time. And I will loose at Mario Kart. But equally, if she has screen time more than usual then so what. Because I’m doing my own thing too. Who knew (not me) that weeding the garden was actually therapeutic? Who knew (I could have guessed actually!) that having scrambled eggs on toast for breakfast, outside in the sun, reading a magazine, by myself, would be so relaxing? And who knew (me) that gin before 6pm on a Saturday tastes so good.
The next two weeks of "school holiday" may be challenging, with less school and learning structure (#nowttodo), but I think the new normal is setting in. If she spends more time on screens then so what? She misses her friends. She is happy right now and she is dealing with all this shit so well, and my priority to keep her happy. We do our own thing individually. And we also do things as a two or as a three. We deal with this in our own way as well as as a family of three. It’s good. Apart from not seeing loved ones outside this house, and financial worries, I could even admit that, for many reasons, I’m actually enjoying lockdown for many reasons. And I know that sounds selfish, when I think of all the people who are risking their lives carrying on with their jobs because they have to, and we need them to keep the country going and to care for our sick. I have 100% admiration for these amazing people. But I’m doing my (small) bit because it’s all I can do. I’m doing what I’m told, staying at home, except for essential shopping and daily exercise. And it feels OK. Sometimes more than OK. And I don’t want to feel guilty for making the most of it, because I can and I have to, in order to get through it.
(Pic is Bolton Abbey)
My worry this holiday is “what will Mia do all day for two weeks?!” How can I try and implement school work when it is “holiday time”? But equally, I don’t want her on her phone all day every day. When lockdown first happened I was glad that Mia is the age she is. I thought if she was younger it would be more difficult to entertain her. Which of course it would be, but at least little ones can be entertained with more options, as they are happier (usually!) to play, do crafts, bake, walk, read together, without question.... An 11 year old teenager just wants to TikToc dance, FaceTime, WhatsApp and YouTube. I know parents of younger ones will probably disagree and think it far easier to have an older one during these times, but I think each age comes with pros and cons in this pandemic. I wish I could play schools with her again, and trains (which I used to hate). I wish we could get the house messy with crafts again, and snuggle up and read. I wish she would take a simple walk to see the ducks round the lake without question again. We did all these things when she was young, and I loved them, but now I have all this extra time I want to do them again! And now I miss them. Maybe if we could go back in time, after a day or two I would wish I had an 11 year old again.... Or maybe not.... But I am determined we will do crafts together. We will play board games. We will walk. We will have family time. And I will loose at Mario Kart. But equally, if she has screen time more than usual then so what. Because I’m doing my own thing too. Who knew (not me) that weeding the garden was actually therapeutic? Who knew (I could have guessed actually!) that having scrambled eggs on toast for breakfast, outside in the sun, reading a magazine, by myself, would be so relaxing? And who knew (me) that gin before 6pm on a Saturday tastes so good.
The next two weeks of "school holiday" may be challenging, with less school and learning structure (#nowttodo), but I think the new normal is setting in. If she spends more time on screens then so what? She misses her friends. She is happy right now and she is dealing with all this shit so well, and my priority to keep her happy. We do our own thing individually. And we also do things as a two or as a three. We deal with this in our own way as well as as a family of three. It’s good. Apart from not seeing loved ones outside this house, and financial worries, I could even admit that, for many reasons, I’m actually enjoying lockdown for many reasons. And I know that sounds selfish, when I think of all the people who are risking their lives carrying on with their jobs because they have to, and we need them to keep the country going and to care for our sick. I have 100% admiration for these amazing people. But I’m doing my (small) bit because it’s all I can do. I’m doing what I’m told, staying at home, except for essential shopping and daily exercise. And it feels OK. Sometimes more than OK. And I don’t want to feel guilty for making the most of it, because I can and I have to, in order to get through it.
(Pic is Bolton Abbey)
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