Day 40 - Kids

I’ve heard from people, and seen on Zoom and social media, many are struggling with working in lockdown with young children. I will admit I don’t envy these guys, although at the start of lockdown I did. When it first happened I wished that Mia was younger, so I could have that time with her without having to work. Just the 3 of us with total family time, and I would happily have gone back to the days of playing schools and trains and Lego and crafts and story’s. We did all these things when Mia was little and I know I am lucky to have spent so much time just me and her over the years. So when this all started I was envious of those with young kids who were not allowed to work, and even those that have to. It’s perfect, I naively thought, they can spend all this lovely family time together... I was a fool! I’ve heard from many how hard it is looking after little ones in lockdown, and most of these people have to work as well! And from what I’ve heard it is very difficult indeed. And, having taken off my rose tinted glasses, I see it must be. And actually I’m so glad I have an older child in these times, I take my hat off to all the parents of younger ones! I remember the “having to entertain them” days and I do miss those days so much, as everyone with older ones does. But to have to do it all day every day, in lockdown, combined with work / surviving a pandemic... OMG these parents are amazing!!! 

I think there must be a perfect lockdown scenario, where you have a couple of young children who play together and never argue, and who love long walks. You and your partner can’t work, homeschooling together is a joy. You live in a big house with lots of land and animals in the countryside, and you have no money worries. Your parents live in a cottage on your land. And Tesco visits once a week with supplies. For me, that would be lockdown bliss! But not a reality! 

There are challenges with any aged child. Namely trying to figure out algebra for me! I’m also worrying about Mia missing so much school and being without her friends, which I don’t think would be so important when she was in primary school. But I’m so thankful this hasn’t happened in her last year of primary or secondary, or during a year of exams. This is really shit for these kids and I feel for them.

But what I cant help feeling sad about (and I know this day comes to us all with kids) is the fact that she prefers her mates and technology to being with me. At school all was ok, as she had that balance. But now it seems What’s App, TikToc, FaceTime are all far more interesting than family board games, films, walks... Gutted. So that’s why I sometimes find myself wishing Mia was a bit younger than she is during this time. But then I think of the issues associated with having younger ones and I feel thankful. Because it is easier for us, mostly. Apart from the days when maths is on the timetable....

In a normal world, Mia would have seen her friends at school and me and her would have gone out and done something lovely together on all the weekends and school holidays when I wasn’t working. And (whatever she says!) we were best mates who did everything together. Now we can’t because of lockdown. But also, in part, because teenage years are approaching. So we are at home together (which is lovely) but we are wishing we could be out and about, and are counting down the days until we can once again go to all the places we love. I hope she will still want to when this is all over! I know she is growing up, and doesn’t need me like she did. And I know it is tough for those with little ones right now, and I have full respect for them all. You may think I am crazy, but I would love to swap ages right now.....but only for a day or 2, then I think I would need my 11 year old back, evn with her phone and IPad.

(Pic is beautiful reflections on the pond at Nun Monkton)